Growing Pains

Growing Pains

“So you’re telling me, you told your teacher you got amnesia, and that’s why you didn’t complete your homework”? My mom was so strict when it came to my education. She always wanted to be in the know. Know what’s going on in class, before class, and even when I get home from school. So I guess you can imagine her reaction when my teacher, Mrs. Newman, called her to let her know I was the only kid in my class who had not done the homework. She was even more disappointed in my excuse that I had fallen and bumped my head (which is what caused the amnesia), and that I slept the whole night. Also, I told my teacher that I dreamt that I was in a locked room with zombies, who were about to attack me over a hard- boiled egg.

My mother was furious. “Well I guess you just love me being detective mom, huh Aubrey”? she said to me. “Every time I give you an inch, you take a mile. This time I want to know every assignment, and when it’s due . . . Ugh! All of these tall tales; I don’t know what to do with you. This is just like last weekend when I asked you how my closet got so messy, and you said Jr. and a few women aliens invaded it for a makeover. I am SICK OF THIS AUBREY”! My mother started to walk out of the kitchen so her voice got very faint, but I heard her say “You are going to be a little soldier around here. No cell phone, or sleepovers until I see some improvement”!

This is just great! I hate when my mom is mad at me over things like school, when I really feel like I’m not able to do the work like the other kids. See, my family kind of goes like this… My mom, Cathy is a nurse. She works from seven at night, all the way until four the next morning. I never see her, because when I come home from school, she’s either resting, or out running errands. I never really knew my daddy. I know his name’s Joe, and he lives all the way in Duluth, Georgia. He’s a big time doctor down there, or something. He’s got a lotta money and a lotta kids. I guess he gives all his other kids money cuz I never get a dime. But my mom says we don’t need his dimes, we got all the dimes we need. I know way more about him, and all the other shenanigans that go on in our family because I hear my mom on the phone with my aunt Crystal all the time. They gossip all night long about everything. I believe I know a secret or two about just about everyone in my family, including my mom.

All of the other kids at school have at least one parent that’s at home waiting for them when they get out of school. But not me. I have to come home and take care of my sick grandmother. She’s got something my mom calls advancing Alzheimer’s. I don’t even think she remembers my mom. Sometimes I catch her in the bathroom crying. I know its cuz of grandma, so I just let her be. She hates when I see her crying. Grandma knows me though. She always calls my name when she needs something.

So I pretty much look after myself, and I like it that way. Some of my friends at school have parents that know everything they do. But not me. I would say I’m more mature then the other kids in the sixth grade. It’s just my pet monkey, Jr. and me. I got him for my eleventh birthday, and he’s been my best friend ever since. And this all brings me back to school. I really like school, I really do! But I just don’t get it sometimes. I don’t think I’m as smart as the other kids. And when I try to go to my mom for help she’s either sleep or at work. And I can’t even THINK about going to Mrs. Newman. She’s so fed up with me cuz I lie to her all the time. She told me my nose was gonna grow from all my lies…. I wonder if it’s true? I stare in the mirror every night.

The next morning my mom woke me up early for school. She said she wanted to talk to me about the day before. Before she could speak, I told her I was sorry, and was gonna do better in school, even though I really hadn’t planned on it. “No baby” my mom said. “I am sorry. I am really, really sorry. I’m sorry for a few things. First thing is I’m sorry for coming down on you so hard. I know I’m not always around to help you with your homework, or with anything for that matter”. My mom quickly turned away, and ran to the paper towel holder. She came back with two pieces. She tried offering me one to make it seem like she wasn’t the only one who needed one. “I’m also sorry for your father baby, and the way he chose to live his life; without you. This may be too much for you to understand right now but this was always one of my fears. When I was pregnant with you, I feared your father walking out on us. Not being there for you more importantly. I knew being a teenage mother would have its challenges, but your father leaving us as soon as you were born was not what I had expected. I just NEED to let you know it’s not your fault baby. None of this is your fault. And I don’t know about the other kids parents at school, but I love you more than two parents together could. I need you to work with me though Aubrey, please”! I wanted to cry with my mom to let her know I cared, but I couldn’t find the tears. I’ve never been real emotional. So I gave her a hug and a kiss and said, “I will mama”. “And what daddy did to us is not your fault”. I left the kitchen and went to my room to get ready for school.

After school, I decided to keep my grandmother company. All she does is lie in bed and watch old episodes of the Golden Girls. We watched a whole five episodes together before she even spoke one word to me. “It is important that you do well in school, Aubrey”, my grandmother said. She could barely make out her words so it was important for me to listen carefully so I could fully understand her. “I hear you ‘round here arguing with ya mama about getting your work done. Doing well in school is one of the best things you can do for yourself. It is gonna be what determines what you are when you grow up. Stop with the excuses Aubrey. Stop giving your teacher and ya mama a hard time. Put forward your best effort. It’s called growing pains, Aubrey”. My grandma could hardly get out the “p” sound in pains, so she stuttered until she could get it out. “It’s when you don’t wanna grow up and act like the adult you’re becoming, but you have to”. I’ve never really been a crier, but those words from my ailing grandma brought me to tears. I don’t want my grandma’s last memories of me to be bad ones. I responded with a quick, “I will do better grandma, promise”, gave her a hug and kiss, and quietly left the room.

When I got to my room, Jr., was sitting on my bed next to my box of tissue from the bathroom. “You’re the only one I can really count on Jr., that’s why you’re my best….” Ringggggggggggggggg The phone rang as soon as I sat down. This always happens. “Hello” I say when I answer the phone. “Cathy! Cathy!”, the angry voice on the other end said. “Girl don’t make me come down there and make things real ugly for you and the girl. You never listened; this is why we’re not together now. I don’t have time for this bullshit. My mother wants to see all of her grandkids this Thanksgiving. After that you can have her back. I don’t wanna see her anyway. But at least let her see her other grandmother that she’s never met”. My father really doesn’t know anything about me if he can’t even tell the difference between an eleven year old and a thirty year olds voice. “Dad”, I trembled as I tried to find the strength to speak a word that I had never said to anyone before. “This is Aubrey”. I felt my hand began to sweat and my stomach started to feel funny like it had to throw up. “Heyyyyyyyy baby girl”, he said shockingly. “I was looking for ya mama, is she there”? “No. No dad she’s not”, I said. “And no. No, I wont be making a special trip alllll the way to Georgia to spend time with a family that hates my mama and me”. My father interrupted, “Wait baby it’s not like that. I didn’t mean anything I said I was just angry”. “I know all about your ANGER dad” I replied. “Anger that has kept you from seeing me, taking care of me, helping me and my mama out since the day I was born. I know about that anger. We don’t need anything from you now though. Mama and me doing just fine. And you don’t need anything from us. Stop calling here trynna upset my mama”, I screamed as a slammed the phone down on the receiver. Honestly I really can’t remember if I slammed it or it fell out of my sweaty trembling hands. Either way I hoped I had gotten rid of my “daddy” for good. Me and Jr. hugged each other for about five minutes, then went downstairs to get him a snack while I started my homework.

“And that’s called growing pains. And that was my grandma’s last words to me before she passed away. She told me that no matter what I did, I always needed to do my best. And that was the most influential person I knew, Thank you”. The class clapped, and Mrs. Newman was at her desk patting her eye down with a tissue. She said that my speech bought her to tears, and she was happy I completed the assignment. I told her that I only did it cuz my grandma was watching down on me with Jesus, and those are two people I do not want to disappoint. Mrs. Newman laughed as I walked away, and took my seat in the back of the class by the window.